Cry Wolf Part II

There will come a time in your life when you feel utterly and completely alone.  No prospects of rescue from the loneliness.

They say instinctively animals remember their way back home.  Maybe it's a sense of smell or place or memory.   We are more fragile.  In an instant our memories can become shadows.  The distance between ourselves and the ones we love can begin to seem insurmountable.  All some of us can do is to stay close to home and hope that we will not be forgotten.  But in the end, remembering is not entirely up to us, neither is coming home.

The Past

Life would be so good if we could just freeze moments in time.  The time when we were happy, when we knew we were loved, but we can't.  Instead we find ourselves retracing footsteps that may have washed away.  We fight to remember our connections even as time wipes our slate clean.  We strive to make new connections that we hope time will indulge.  When communication fails, words remain behind.  Proof that we're here, that we mattered, that someone cared.  In the end, the past may be all we have.

Patience

It's a hard thing - patience.  But when something means enough to you, whether you're waiting to regain your past or start your future, patience is critical.  So what, in your life, is worth waiting for?

They say patience is a virtue and like most virtues, we never now if we possess it until it's been tested.  If we're lucky, we have someone to take that test with us and if we can pass that test, if we can wait long enough, we just might find the reward greater than we ever expected.

The funny thing about waiting is it always seems the more we want something the longer we have to wait for it.  Deciding to wait out the long haul shouldn't be taken lightly, but it's an easier decision to live with than others.

 

Regret: Past, Present, Future

Regret is a funny thing.  You try your best in life to avoid it but sometimes it's the hard things in life that teach us the most, which makes you wonder, if given a chance, how many of us would do things differently?

For some, regret is the very thing that helps us push past our fear and move into the future.  For others it's the thing that allows us to re-explore our past.  At its best regret can be the catalyst for new beginnings where anything and everything is still possible.

The Wizard of Oz

Movie magic.  There's something about sitting in a dark theater that lets you escape the reality of your own life and live in the fantasy of someone else's story.  What if the cameras were turned on you?  In the movie of your life do you like what you see? 

We all love to lose ourselves in a good movie.  When I was a girl I loved the Wizard of Oz especially the moment when Dorothy opens the door into that fantastic world.  But once Dorothy appreciated how bright and beautiful everything was, she realized she had a bit of a mess on her hands.  One of the classic examples of "be careful what you wish for".  Spend five minutes in a fantasy and you just might find yourself wishing your old life back.  We miss what's right in front of us when we're busy looking over the rainbow.  Sometimes it takes stepping into someone else's world to realize how much you love the life you have.  No matter how magical the movies are, at the end of the day there's no place like home. 

Avoid Dating a Sociopath

Sociopaths are common in today's dating scene. You may even be dating one right now! According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSMMD) a sociopath is "a person with a psychopathic personality who's behavior is antisocial and who lacks a sense or moral responsibility or social conscience." But how does sociopath behavior manifest itself?

1. Sociopaths lie....A LOT. They're usually very believable liars and rarely tell the truth. They aren't concerned with what's real or truthful and that makes it easier for them to deceive you.
2. Sociopaths lack remorse or guilt. They don't have empathy for other people's feelings. They don't take responsibility for their actions or accept blame.
3. Sociopaths are incapable of feeling real love. Because sociopaths make more enemies than friends, they don't give or receive love easily. Their deceit usually runs in their relationships.
4. Sociopaths are irresponsible. They're usually unreliable and often oblivious to the harm or disappointment they cause others.
5. Sociopaths are impulsive. They often exhibit behaviors of promiscuity, infidelity, alcohol abuse, yada, yada.

Are you dating a sociopath?

Happy People

It's a common belief that positive thinking leads to a happier healthier life. As children we're told to smile and be cheerful and put on a happy face. As adults we're told to look on the bright side, to make lemonade and see glasses as half full. Sometimes reality can get in the way of our ability to act the happy part. Your health can fail, boyfriends can cheat, friends can disappoint. It's in these moments when you just want to get real, drop the act and be your true scared unhappy self. Ask most people what they want out of life and the answer's simple...to be happy. Maybe it's this expectation of wanting to be happy that just keeps us from ever getting there. Maybe the more we try and will ourselves to states of bliss, the more confused we get to the point where we don't recognize ourselves. Instead we just keep smiling trying like hell to be the happy people we wish we were, until eventually it hits us. It's been there all along. Not in our dreams and hopes but in the known, the comfortable, the familiar....

What Are You Waiting For?

You have what it takes to change your life or even your world. So what's stopping you? Quit making excuses and embrace your power. Life could pass you by while you wait for just the right time.

Imagine having the power to step forward and change anything we want to change; to have a point of view, stand up firmly for it and be strong. Sounds simple and yet the most confident among us give away that power from time to time. It's not because we're weak or because our courage fails us; it's because we don't know how strong we really are. Even if we get a glimmer of our true grit, we back off.

When the opportunity presents itself, take it!

September 5, 2007

Drama Queens

An excerpt from that unwritten book I've not been typing....

One day in a search for unpaid bills, unanswered phone calls, unmet deadlines, you hadn't missed so much as even a teeth cleaning. Life appears to be in order. Soon you realize you're in the throes of an existential crisis. What's wrong? For the first time in your life, you're in a relationship where absolutely nothing is wrong. It's just smooth sailing. Nothing but calm seas and blue horizons as far as the eye can see. You adore each other. You have fun together. You mesh. And it feels really good.

For most, we seem to be used to the hunt and now we're in a relationship that effortless. Maybe we're just not used to being with someone who doesn't do the ever so seductive withholding dance. When things come too easy, we're suspect. Do they have to get complicated before we believe they're for real? We're raised to believe that the course of true love never runs smoothly. There always has to be obstacles in Act II before you can live happily ever after in Act III. But what happens when the obstacles aren't there? Does this mean there's something missing? Do we need drama to make a relationship work? I should think not. So why can't we get used to the effortless, smooth sailing kind of relationship to which I know there has to be such thing.


August 30, 2007

I'm Going to Denver

We all get at least one good wish a year...over the candles on our birthday cake. Some of us throw in more...on eyelashes, fountains, lucky stars and every now and then one of those wishes comes true. So what then? Is it as good as we had hoped? Do we bask in the warm glow of our happiness or do we just notice that we've got a long list of other wishes waiting to be wished? We don't wish for the easy stuff. We wish for the big things. Things that are ambitious and out of reach. We wish because we need help and we're scared and we know we may be asking too much. We still wish though, because sometimes they come true.